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Friday, June 8, 2012

Soft Serve!

Fatherhood is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. We are so lucky to have such a happy child. He wakes up with a smile, plays all day with a smile and goes to sleep with a smile. He does have a few moments of grumpiness when he is hungry and very tired, but other than that Charlie is a bundle of joy.

Charlie loves to jump in his bouncer and stomp his feet in his step and play piano. Both of these items are very entertaining for him and it is a good way for him to wear himself out. Apparently the upright position and the ability to bounce around and move his legs makes these entertaining items a great place to work out a deuce. Charlie has a very distinct grunt and facial expression when it comes to clearing his bowels. If he is in the bouncer of the step and play and you hear the grunt, you better remove him rapidly because it could get bad.

Charlie woke up bright and early at 7:30 am and I took him down stairs to start the day. I placed him in the step and play and turned on Nick jr. I laid down on the couch to rest for a while he played. As I was laying there I heard the grunt. It only happened once so I did not think too much of it. I laid back down and continued resting my eyes while Charlie squealed and laughed at the TV.

A few minutes later I caught a whif of that unmistakeable odor. I moved in for a rapid extraction, but it was too late. The deed had been done. The problem is that the seat of the bouncer and step and play creates pressure that does not leave any room for the diaper to properly work so everything is pushed out the sides and up the back. This one was not the worst that I have seen, but I had no idea how bad it could get.

I began another toxic clean up and things got out of control. This was definitely not a three-wiper. It was up his back, down his leg, all over his onesie and now on the floor. I didn't panic. I just took a deep breath (bad idea), assessed the situation and methodically went back to work. Well, plan A failed. Charlie ended up covered from head to toe, literally. I ended up with radioactive material on my arm, shirt and I think that I even had a little on my lip. This was worse than "The Blowout". This was mega apocalypse blowout.

What a way to start the morning. Charlie was as happy as could be, but Daddy was not so happy after all of this. I got the situation under control and everything was okay. We ended up having a great day, but it was definitely a rough way to start.

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